July 4th Saturday.

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Im so burnt, ive got blisters ontop of my burn. Been covered up since yesterday. Factor 50 clearly doesnt work. Jasper's started to get blisters too. Jesse's complaining that his shoulders are hurting him. Made him go in the pool today with a t shirt on to keep him covered. I just keep applying suncream to us all. 
Day 4 no vape, I would give my right arm for a vape right about now haha. I can do this!! 
Im missing Jensen, I need to get him a gift to take home. He always buys me a gift when ge goes on holiday. 
I still think about my dad and Jay-Dee even though im on holiday. Grief doesnt go away. If only they were still here. I miss them both so much. 
Bet Jay-Dee and my dad would of booked up for this holiday and come with us.
We're booking up with Jensen when we get back for next year's holiday,  so that'll be nice. Grateful for my living children, but by god do I miss my son.

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