August 16th Sunday.
I hand on heart dont know how i get through each day. Im drowning in grief. I feel like i can't do this anymore. Im heartbroken. The days are passing me by and my grief is getting worse. I miss them more and more as the days go on. Ive got no motivation. Jesse has gone Chester Zoo and I was meant be meeting a friend, but ive got zero motivation. Im still sat in my pjs and its 3.45pm. Im so tired, I could just get into bed. I just need some time alone to gather my thoughts, I need a few days in bed to just lie there. I need to sit in a room by myself and just breathe. Can't do any of that though because of the boys and my animals. I guess its a blessing really because it forces me to get up. I wish I could tell you how I feel inside, but its just numb. I want to scream at the world for taking my dad and son from me. I want to cry, but I have to stay strong for my boys. To look at me you wouldnt know that I was dead inside. I smile and talk like im fine, but im not. Im far fro...