July 16th Thursday.

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Didn't get up for the school run, don't know what's wrong with me. Hes got non uniform day tomorrow, going try get him in school for his last day in year 5. Got my brother coming early so ill be up. Hes dropping me a crate of pop off whilst hes at work.
Feel like shit today, mentally speaking. Got my dad and son on my mind. I have to believe my son is with my dad, its the only comfort I get from losing them both. 
I can't wait to die to see them both again. I miss them so much. 
Ive cleaned my bathroom to try and keep myself busy. Dont know why im struggling to wake up in the morning.
Im still dieting, calorie counting so I dont go over 1400 calories each day. I will lose some weight!
Anyway, im just doing a wash and going get that pegged out. Going go see my mates this weekend, going force myself to socialise. 
Thank god after tomorrow Jesse has got 6 weeks off.
Oh yeh, also, Jasper landed in Portugal a few hours ago. 2 holidays in 1 month, hes a lucky boy. Just hope he stays safe. Hes only gone for 4 nights so ill see him on Monday. 

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