April 11th Friday.

So it's nearly 6pm and I've eaten nothing all day. I woke up this morning and felt like I was going throw up, but I didn't. Thank god. 

I should lose some serious weight on this injection, I'm excited. I've got about 5 stone to lose though, I'm massive. Well I feel massive.

Took Jesse school today and met my friends in the cafe for our usual catch up and cups of tea. I love seeing them.

Only one week until my baptism, I'm so nervous, but also excited to feel closer to God. Church has gotten me through some hard days, I'm so thankful that I found my faith. Prayer gets me through dark days too.

My brother came this morning and has not long gone home. So today has been a better day. Thank you Jesus.

I take a lot of medication just to get me through each day, it's depressing that I have morning meds and night time meds, but I clearly need them so I'll carry on.

I've just had a bath and got my pj's on.

Jasper and Jensen are going the gym soon and I'll carry on watching Power. How my Friday nights have changed since being sober.

Manchester tomorrow with my boys, so I'll let you know how that goes. I've always had a loving bond with my kids but it's stronger since their brother has passed away. I worry so much about losing another child. I tell them I love them all the time. The last message I wrote to Jay-Dee said I love him. Thank god I sent that message. The last message he saw was me telling him I loved him. Thank God.