January 6th Tuesday.

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No school again for Jesse today. This staying in the house is no good for my mental health, because now I have anxiety about taking him tomorrow. Been in the house too long.  Got my boys all here with me and i still feel so lonely. Going try go my mates tomorrow night, get me out of the house a few hours. Made a lobby today and my house smells all warm and cosy. Mental health is low today, shocker, haha. My nieces 6th birthday today and my 42nd birthday in a few days. Its not the same as you get older, its just another day to me. Damian asked me what I wanted, but there's nothing I want. In the end I just said a Primark gift card. I could do with some new tops so ill use it for that. Really got to push myself in the morning to get up and take Jesse school. In my defence, I have got up both mornings to take him, but then I saw the snow, so I just climbed back into bed. I love my bed and I love being asleep. Its my escape from my own brain. I kept the heating on all last night, it was so cosy when I woke up this morning. By the way im doing shit with my diet. 

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