January 17th Saturday.

I was thinking last night about how ive turned my whole life around. From being a piss head and drinking everyday to being 4 years sober. Went out for a carvery last night with my brother, sister and the kids. It was lovely us all being together. Went back my sisters after for a few hours. Was a good night. I went to meet that girl ive been talking to, just to say hi and ive got to say, shes definitely my type, but we'll see where it goes. Ive messaged this morning but heard nothing back yet. So we'll see. But going back to how ive turned my life around, I think back to my old life when I drank alcohol and it disgusts me. So thankful im strong enough to stay sober. I wish Jay-Dee and my dad could see me now. They'd be so proud of me. My boys are proud of me and thats what keeps me sober. Not doing anything today except washing. Going go strip my bedding i think. I was reliving the days upto my dad's death last night. It was horrible. Told you grief just sneaks up on you. Trying to sleep and I had visions of my dying dad in my head. Today is a new day and I feel thankful im alive. Im on a serious diet! Cutting out all the chocolate. I dont want to be fat anymore. Its so hard to lose the weight being on Olanzopine. Im going speak to my psychiatrist see if they can change my medication when I see her. I could do with a gastric band haha. Anyway, going go strip my bedding. Enjoy your Saturday.