December 16th Tuesday.

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Forced myself to get up this morning to do the school run. So glad I did because I forgot id paid for afternoon tea for Jesse and I with Santa at the school. Had a lovely afternoon with Jesse. Really lifted my mood. Just got back from my friends. Had a catch up with the girls and we had a laugh. Plenty of cups of tea. How boring, I know, but ive got to stay sober. My life depends on it. My kids need me, dont they? I dont feel too bad today, im always sad, but ive got to learn to live with it. So thats what im doing. Did I want go see my friends? Absolutely not. Do I feel better for going? Yes. So glad I force myself to do things. Always feel better when I do. Its just some days are really hard. To get through a day without wanting to die, is amazing. I have to cherish the better days because unfortunately, they dont last. Anyway, I feel better for getting out of the house. Still depressed, but we carry on. You watch tomorrow be a shitty day!

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