September 6th Saturday.

Decided not go Church tomorrow, i want to lie in. I know i should go but im choosing sleep. Before I was put on Olanzopine I suffered for years with insomnia. It was horrendous. I'd sleep for 3 hours then I'd be awake all night. It was literally driving me insane. I was losing my mind. Olanzopine literally saved my life. Anyway, ive showered today, done a load of washing and drying. Ive been to see my friend for a couple of hours, which was nice. There's 4 of us meeting up tomorrow for a catch up. I try to see them as much as I can because it keeps me from going insane. Ive just had a take away with the boys. We always have a take away on Saturday because Jasper sleeps over. Last night as I lay in bed, all I could think about was Jay-Dee. I didn't get sleep until after 12am. Couldn't switch off so im going bed early tonight. Its 10 to 8 now, ill be in bed for 9pm. How my Saturdays have changed. I'll go bed tonight and not wake up hungover. Thank you Jesus. Can't believe how long ive been sober for. Over 3 and a half years. Its crazy, from drinking every night/day, to nothing at all. I wont even eat anything containing alcohol. I'm dead strict with myself. Ive worked hard to get to today, im not about to throw it all away. I'm proud of myself. I'd be in a grave now if I was still drinking. I can control the intrusive thoughts sober. I couldnt when I was drinking. God im tired of life. Sick of waking up everyday morning. Life's shit.