December 24th Tuesday.

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Christmas eve and I'm sat crying. Losing my child has destroyed what was left of me. I'm really struggling today. 
I'm not feeling festive at all, I'm sad that my son is no longer here with me. I'm sad that my dad is no longer here. I just keep crying. 
I've got no plans to see family over Christmas, my own mother hasn't even invited me hers. It's shit having a broken family. 
Myself, my brother and sister just have each other. Christmas is hard.
I've got dressed because Jensen is taking me to finish off my food shop today.
I'm meant be going church tonight but I've got prep all my veg and potatoes today.
God I'll be glad when Christmas is over.
I'm so glad I've got my children around me because I'd be lost without them.
Christmas time is hard when you have people you love in heaven.
Anyway, merry Christmas. 

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