May 26 2024 Medication

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I want to come off all my medication..
I want to be able to feel again, I'm numb to everything around me.
I'm not living, I'm constantly in a drug enduced coma.
I take 375mg a day of Venlafexine and 10mg at night of Olanzopine..
That's a lot of drugs in my system.
I want to be able to feel again.
I want the old Ann-Louise back but I know that's not possible, so I just want to feel again. I want to feel happiness and sadness. 
I'm like a zombie, I don't care about anything anymore, I've got no will to live and I'm fed up of it so my next step is to speak to my doctors and see what they say.
Something has got to give in my life before I end up killing myself.
I can't live like this any longer, something needs to change..
What if I come off the medication and I end up killing myself, the medication is the only thing keeping me going but I hate taking it. I hate being numb. I'm sad and numb!
..what if I come off the medication and find myself? 
..what If stay on the medication and find myself?

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