Thursday April 6th 2023

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I rememebr months ago crying on the phone to my Psychiatrist, whilst crying I remember saying 'I don't want to die and I am scared I am going to kill myself'. Do you know how hard it is for a person to cry out for help? It's pretty hard! Im going go out on a limb and say, if you follow my blog, you've either been where I am or you're currently going through hell like I do daily. Do you know how hard it is, to not kill myself? That too, is pretty fucking hard! When you've got someone you love above you and little people around me that need me, the struggle is REAL. Like, every fucking day is a god damn hard battle, I so desperately want to see my dad, but, my kids need their mom. I have enrolled on a Suicide and Selfharm course that I start today. What do I hope to gain, I hear you say.. Well, I want to understand more about the whole situation, I want to know what is wrong with me and when i've done that, then, I want to help others who struggle with life like me. I'll keep you posted on how it goes. Take care love Ann-louise xxx

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