November 9th Saturday.

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Jesse's at Trentham Gardens with Damian and I'm sat looking at my sons urn. I need to get out of this house more. I've walked my dog, and done some washing and I can't wait go back to bed. 
I struggle through the week, but the weekends are worse for me.
My son left for a Rave in Liverpool on the Saturday and killed himself on a Sunday.
I'm always going to struggle with weekends, I know.
I'm still waiting for my son to visit me in my dreams, I long to see his face. 
Losing my son has destroyed what little there was left of me. 
I don't know how I'm ever going to get better. I'll be a grieving mother forever.
My sons death has destroyed me.

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