August 8th Continued.

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I've just been into Jay-Dees bedroom. I don't go in very often because I break my heart like I just have. I'm so sad that my son is dead. How am I ever going to empty his room? What do I do with his things? Will I ever be ready? I'm sat with tears streaming from my eyes. 
They say grief comes in waves and it really does. I was ok this morning and now I'm sat crying.
It's knocked me sick sitting in his bedroom, I'm absolutely devastated.
The loss of a child is a pain inside that I've never felt before. Losing my dad was hard, but losing my beautiful child kills me inside.
Every moment of everyday I think about my child. I'll never feel whole again. I will always feel an emptiness inside.
Everyday I survive is a day closer to seeing my child again.
I welcome death.

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