August 10th 10 Weeks Ago Today My Son Left The House & Never Came Home.

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I feel like im losing my fucking mind. Im sat crying. Everyone is moving on with their lives and im stuck in this fucking dark hole I feel buried inside. 10 weeks ago today my baby left for a rave in Liverpool and never came home. When will this get easier? Im angry at the world. I just want my son back!!! I keep seeing angel numbers that give me messages that things will get better, but when? I really think ive lost my mind. I could scream at the world. I just want to go outside and scream as loud as I can. Jesses just come and hugged me because he can see im crying and told me to turn that frown upside down. Honestly if it wasnt for my other boys keeping me going, id be gone. Id be dead already. Its unfair that ive got to stay alive. Why cant I just die already? Im not enjoying a single thing about being alive, I havent since my dad passed away. Some days im ok, but when I say ok, I mean bareable. Im not enjoying life at all. If something doesnt give im not sure how much more I can take of this life.

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