Keep seeing adverts on tv about funeral care, so thought to myself, maybe I should plan mine now as you never know when youre going to kill yourself right?!?
Wrong!.. you have to be over 50 to take out a plan!!
What about us that dont think we'll make it to 50??
Anyway, thats that plan gone out the window.
I know I sound morbid, ive always been a morbid person, ive never been scared to die, maybe thats because ive suffered with depression for as long as I can remember.
I hope one day I can look back on my blogs and see how far ive come, I hope one day I find true happiness in life.
We can all wish, right?
March 1st Sunday.
Natalie bombarded me with messages last night, pissed me right off. Telling me she loves me, so this morning ive told her its infatuation and she can't possibly love me and to leave me alone. Ive got enough shit going on in my head without her adding to it. Fuck it off! Life's so much easier being single. Just me and my boys. Going eat what I want today then start calorie counting tomorrow, try shift some weight. Got us all a McDonald's breakfast this morning haha. Don't know how im going stick to a diet, but im going try my best. Getting my hair done tomorrow, really can't be bothered, but my roots are so bad. Thank god my mums a hairdresser haha. I feel ok today, better than I have done the past few days/weeks. Im cooking a gammon joint for dinner. Still need wash my slow cooker, but that can wait till tomorrow. Trying stay positive today and be more thankful. Its hard when you're depressed and grieving. I pray im not like this forever because its horrible. Yo...
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