Another positive day, feeling pretty good today. Not done anything or been anywhere but i'm feeling ok.
I never suffer with spots but i've had a break out.. probably due to all the shit I keep eating!
Swear its the Olanzopine!! I crave sugary treats all the time.
Sunday tomorrow, I plan on going to church then in the afternoon i'm going to join the gym. My son Jasper is going with me for my first time because my anxiety about going alone will be through the roof, so once i've been once with him, i'm hoping after i'll be able go alone.
I'm determined to get out of this house and get fit.
I'm not that bothered about my weight gain, i'd just like to tone up and try and eat better.
I actually like my weight gain strangly enough, I feel very womanly with all my curves and my bigger boobs are an added bonus.
Anyway i'll keep you updated on how the gym goes.
See you tomorrow xoxo
June 14th My Son Is Coming Home.
The coroner has rang today and the funeral home. My son will be getting collected from Liverpool, Monday morning. Which means I can hopefully see him Tuesday. Its Friday today. It will be over 2 weeks since I last saw my child. As a mother, my body is yearning to see my son. I just need to hold him and kiss him on his head. I feel sickness to the pit of my stomach, I'm dreading seeing my baby in a coffin, I'm dreading the funeral. This shouldn't be happening. His funeral will be July 1st at 12.15. I just feel numb. Im convinced its not my son and he'll just arrive home at some point.. I feel hollow with a sick feeling in my stomach. A few of my friends delivered me a beautiful canvas of my son this morning. What beautiful, thoughtful people I have in my life. I don't really know how I feel or what to say, I don't understand how I'm still alive. I'm lost...
Comments
Post a Comment