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Somewhere between the old me and the new me, I have lost the real me... How do I find me again? I keep thinking i'm getting better, I mean today wasn't too bad but, i'm still lost as to who I am. Cancer forced me through the menopause and I think that's why I feel so lost, I mean not only that, my best friend dying sort of hit me like a blow to the stomach. My dad was my best friend and he never taught me how to live without him, thats why i'm struggling so much in life. He did everything for me and now i'm clueless in life. I really am a lost soul. The sadness I feel doesn't just hit once a day, it happens numerous times all through out the day, every single fucking day!! I'm not even sorry about how much I mention my dad, I miss him with all I am. Theres an emptiness inside me that will never be filled. What a sad existance I am.....

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