Sinead O'Conners death..

I just watched a video she posted about how she's just been surviving for the past 2 years, how her entire life has just revovled around not dying for the past 2 years. She said she's not staying alive for herself and if it was for her she'd be gone back to her mum. I have never related to a video so much in my entire life. I'm only alive for my children, not me.. if I could i'd be with my dad. The past 2 and half years since my father passed away I have purely been surviving for my children, not me, just my children. I feel so sad after watching Sineads video that she made hours before she passed away. I too feel lonely and isolated, I could easily and happily kill myself but I have my 4 chidren that i'd like to think need their mum around. I feel so sad inside after watching that video because I relate so much with everything she said. What a sad cruel world we live in. Sinead mentioned about having no family, I too have no family that care. The only time they'd care is if I died, they'd cry like they gave a shit but in reality, none of my family give a shit. No one knows the depth of my depression because no one gives a shit and no one will give a shit until i'm gone. That's the sad truth. People only care when it's too late. You know, I wrote a book which shows the depth of my depression and guess what, not 1 member of my family brought my book or even read it... The sad reality is, depression kills and one day it will kill me and when i'm gone that's when my family will act like they gave a shit. The sad fact is, I write this blog because I have no one to talk to and typing my emotions on this blog somehow help me. If I ever stop blogging, just know i'm probably dead.