We've just had a long weekend for the kings coronation, it's Tuesday now 11:58am.
As much as I hate, and I mean loathe the school run, routine is what I need in my life.
I'm a lonely person, the past few years I have isolated myself from the world. It's not good.
Sort of glad i've got this blog really, writing stuff down keeps me sane.
I keep racking my brains thinking, what can I do in life that I will enjoy?
I don't know what I wnt to do and I hate this feeling.
I seem to watch everyone else living their lives and I feel dead inside, my days roll into one. Like groundhog day but worse!
Wonder if you could go insane from loneliness!? You know, like in old age..
I cut all my nails yesterday and forgot one, just noticed as I type haha.
Anyway, bye.
June 14th My Son Is Coming Home.
The coroner has rang today and the funeral home. My son will be getting collected from Liverpool, Monday morning. Which means I can hopefully see him Tuesday. Its Friday today. It will be over 2 weeks since I last saw my child. As a mother, my body is yearning to see my son. I just need to hold him and kiss him on his head. I feel sickness to the pit of my stomach, I'm dreading seeing my baby in a coffin, I'm dreading the funeral. This shouldn't be happening. His funeral will be July 1st at 12.15. I just feel numb. Im convinced its not my son and he'll just arrive home at some point.. I feel hollow with a sick feeling in my stomach. A few of my friends delivered me a beautiful canvas of my son this morning. What beautiful, thoughtful people I have in my life. I don't really know how I feel or what to say, I don't understand how I'm still alive. I'm lost...
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