NYE 2022

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 Guess what I have planned for tonight?

Nothing.

Nothing at all.

I will be seeing 2023 in alone.

Don't be sad for me, the majority of people getting together tonight have probably slagged each other off throughout the year, then they'll act fake and make resolutions they won't even stick to, whereas me, I spent 2022 alone so going into another year alone really doesn't faze me.

I will be a whole year sober tomorrow, I never, ever thought I'd be sober. Some days are so fucking hard though, it's not easy being sober.

2022 nearly took me out mentally, I am blessed to be seeing in 2023, plus, I won't have a hangover from hell tomorrow so that is a bonus.

I find myself uncomfortable around people in drink, I've become scared of people in drink. Not scared but.. oh I don't know, I just know I'm not comfortable.

So what does 2023 have instore for me??

I'm just going to take each day as it comes, surely there can't be any more death because I'm not strong enough to take any more believe me.

What would I like in 2023??

Don't know. Don't know how I've made it to the end of 2022 so just being alive is a bonus.


I'm going to say this to end 2022.... 

I am blessed to have 4 healthy children and their baby sister in my life, I am thankful to have Damian because without all his help, I wouldn't of made it. He puts up with a lot from me, not intentionally, I just struggle to understand myself some days and I take my frustration out on him. Sorry Damian.

I don't even have any plans for 2023 because if I am honest, I didn't expect to be here. Sad isn't it.

Sort of sad that I am here still, because now I have another year to get through. Life isn't enjoyable, it's pretty fucking grim since my dad passed away.

I've got no aspirations because I don't have a happy mind. It's dark inside my head. So I guess what I could work towards for 2023 is the true meaning of happiness and finding happiness within.

Yep that'll do, 2023 I am going to find at least one thing a day that makes me smile.


Happy NYE to anyone that bothers to read my blogs, have a blessed night and stay safe, see you all in 2023 xxx 

 

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