When I was in therapy with Dove my anxiety was at an all-time high, I remember a coping mechanism for anxiety was music, I personally have always used music for releasing stress, but now I use earbuds when I am out alone. I used to be such a confident person and now It is like I'm a shell of my old self.
You know I was fine this morning, I shaped and tinted my eyebrows, did laundry, tanned my face so I don't look like I am ill (I look ill). After I'd attempted to make myself look half decent at least, I looked in the mirror, stared at myself and thought, you are ugly.
Going back to the music, which coincidentally I have on today (just a mix of everything and anything), I'm still sat feeling lonely. I'm in the living room on the laptop writing this blog post, Jesse is playing in front of me, and I still feel like nothing.
As I sit thinking, my boys really are my entire world, I would walk to the ends of the earth if I had to, to protect and love my children.
What a weird blog post, even I'm thinking that too.
Ok bye xxx
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