Cancer, Depression and Me.

For some reason I can't upload videos.. So the video was basically me, crying, hit rock bottom 😢  I had two choices going through my head.. Suicide or getting help.. I chose the latter.  It will be a year for my dad tomorrow, I've got a doctors appointment Tuesday and bereavement counselling assessment Wednesday.  I can do this!! Next year when I watch that clip back I want to be in a happy place xoxox

Not been on here for a while, I'd say the past 3-4 weeks I've hit rock bottom with my metal health. I feel like I'm rapped in a dark hole I can't see a way out of, it's not a nice place to be. I made a video about a week ago of just how low I was feeling & since then I watched it back & some days are hard & some days I say to myself 'get dressed & get some fresh air'..'get out of this house Ann-louise'. It really is easier said than done though! I've started having panic attacks when doing the school run, I won't leave the house to go the shop alone. Sounds dumb right? Yeh I know but I can't stop what's happening. It's torture, this isn't living life, this is serving & trying my damn best to be "happy" In 4 days it will be a year since my best friend, my dad took his last breath 💔  As the year has gone on its gotten so hard to come to terms with the fact, I will never see him again until my time